What's the phobia for...?

...the fear of ending up on www.peopleofwalmart.com?

The more I check that site out (daily) the more I have this deep seated fear of becoming a Wal-Creature, or worse yet... The Feature Creature.

I used to crack up reading and seeing the people on there, and then one day as I was entering with my mom (who introduced me to the world of "peopleofwalmart.com, BTW) made a comment about ending up on that site... That seed has sprouted into a full on phobia.

Once upon a time, I thought nothing of going to a store in my "comfy clothes." Sweat pants, check. Hoodie, check. Bedhead, check! Flip-flops, check! I mean, who cares? It's WALMART. The low prices and generally low class customers practically invite a Pajama Shopping experience. Come do all your shopping, in your comfy clothes, and experience our broad selection and low prices at convenient locations...

I laughed at the slobs, and the mullets, and the flamboyantly dressed. The freaks, the hillbillies, and the pimps and hoes made me giggle. And it hit me... I have gone to Wal-Mart dressed as Peggy Bundy on Halloween. I have worn short-shorts and tube tops in there (when I wasn't at my fittest). I have gone in there with full on bed head and my pajamas. I have gone in there covered in paint, sweaty from the gym, and covered in yard clippings... I realize I have been very lucky... Because I have all the potential in the world to be a *gasp!* "FEATURE CREATURE."

I am now very careful of my shopping trips...